This is "it"

I'm here. At last. I've been thinking of starting a blog for the longest time but one thing or another always came up and I just never started it. I was actually hoping that a recent dream, now lost, would come true and I would be able to begin my blog with all sorts of amazing topics. You see, last fall I found this gorgeous Cape Cod home set on almost 18 acres. And it was for sale...at a price that we would almost be able to afford, which was even more incredible.

The BEST part was that it was a Christmas tree farm. If you know me, you know how much I love that holiday and how I sing Christmas carols even in July. I fell in love the first time I saw this acreage and every night for the last 8 months I have gone to sleep walking through the house and decorating each room. I would drift off thinking of where I would put the garden, the children's play area, the nut grove, how we would market the trees and I even was thinking of adding lavender fields to diversity the farm....oh and another cool thing about the farm was they already had chickens....my dream chickens, Rhode Island Red chickens too.

Although we had intentions to get our house ready for sale in early spring so we could finally purchase it, we had three children graduating from various levels of schooling; our oldest from University, our third oldest from high school and our 3rd youngest from preschool. Once soccer season hit in April, I knew that it may be summer before we got around to listing our house.

But hey, that was okay because this house was already on the market for a year and even though it's only 30 minutes out of our little city/small town, the price was such that there wasn't tons of interest....and my husband thought that the longer it was on the market the better it would be for us once we made an offer.

Well long story short, the week that we finally had realtors in to list our house was the same week that this beautiful farm finally received a cash offer and it was SOLD! It's gone. My dream is gone and all my blog ideas gone with it. I've been depressed I have to admit.

This is not usual for me...after all I was born in Hope.....not just literally (yes, I was born in the little town of Hope, B.C. Canada) but I was figuritively born IN Hope as well. I'm a glass 1/2 full kind of gal. Always looking at the bright side. A bit like Anne of Green Gables who was eternally optimistic and ALWAYS expecting the best from life. So being bummed isn't my nature...at least not for long.

As I was sitting on the couch in the family room last night and sighing for the up-teenth time about how sad I was that my farm was gone and all my dreams gone with it, my oldest daughter said, well why don't you start where you are at and create the life that you have dreamed of here....in our urban set home and property.

Sure we don't live right in the city......if you can call our little nearby city a city. Yes, we do have a few Starbucks, (don't most small towns have at least one?) but in my opinion unless you have a Chapters book store and a Costco you have not arrived in big city status. We have neither. We also live outside of this little city....in an area that has a welcome sign that says, "Rural living at it's BEST"....although even the nearby little city residents are allowed to have 3 or 4 chickens in their backyards and my rural subdivision still hasn't officially clarified the chicken status by-law...it's in the works they say. I think they are stalling because of the controversy. Heaven forbid is what some neighbours are probably thinking regarding the inclusion of chickens. I think I could make a strong case for poultry based on the "rural living at it's best" signage. What is the best of rural living anyway? No smells? No noise? No traffic?  Don't get me started about my dream for chickens....somehow they are going to be in my future and future posts..

Anyway, where was I, oh yes, my oldest daughter said that I should bloom where I'm planted (although those are not her exact words, more my own take on her thoughts as she would never be that sappy) she just felt that I can start living  my dream here and now. And start writing about it too as there are probably a lot of people out there living a urban/somewhat rural life and interested in what we are doing. We do have an unusual family for these times as well. At least in our part of the country that is. We have 8 children ranging in age from 24 (my smart oldest daughter...who suggested all this to me) down to our twin daughters who recently turned 3. Which by the way, had they been two years old would have meant that I would not have had any time to write, let alone dig out in the garden this summer. One year is huge when you have twins!

Some people would think that having a large family is not environmentally responsible and if you asked me a few years ago I may have agreed but it's been a soul's journey bringing each of these children to earth. The last four arrived after a long struggle (of which future posts will surely include as that was a pivotal point of change for me on my path) full of life lessons that taught me that there are times that all we can do is listen to our hearts and follow the path it tells us to take. My husband calls it the road-less travelled as few choose that lifestyle. Me though, years ago I made a pact with myself that I would listen to my heart as much as I could and try not to listen to what others thought or felt. Even though the journey to our last four children was full of trials, tribulations and loss, the lessons learned were the stuff that life is truly about. I'm more patient, grateful, kind, compassionate, non-judgemental (mostly directed towards myself and I'm courageous and strong. A warrior for sure. I have learned to let go and trust. In the end what is meant to be will come to pass. All shall be well...it ALWAYS is. Big lessons.

I look at my garden and realize all the lessons are taught there as we watch the changing seasons and how things grow and then die. So here we are with 8 children but living with the conscious intent on teaching them to walk as lightly as they can while on this earth. To live fully and move in the direction of their dreams. I want to write about that...being an environmentally responsible person while raising the next generation. To live as sustainable as possible while being mindful of our beautiful earth. Also, while this is a constant battle, to be careful consumers and remember that less is more. Living simply is true abundance. Also to endorse the idea to Reduce, Reuse, and Recycle as part of our family's mantra. Although my fourth child said to me as we were at the grocery store today...buying everything we don't grow ourselves and much more, that I was having a mid life crisis and moving to the farm was my salvation....and why mom did I have to take him on that road! He thinks, like my oldest daughter that I can have that mid life crisis while living in our urban/rural, close to his high-school, all his friends and where internet is available...even though it's never fast enough in his opinion.

Well, that brings me to why I started writing today. I thought carefully last night about what my daughter said as I cried myself to sleep again thinking of how someone else is moving into my Christmas tree farm, and I woke up realizing that I'm okay. And as my son (yes the one that I took to the grocery store today) also said..."Hey mom, you just never know, maybe the farm will come up for sale again. Maybe the new people will have to transfer out of town, maybe they will realize how much work a farm is, maybe they will win the million and move to Hawaii" Maybe miracles will occur. And yes he's right. Maybe that will happen.

Or better yet, maybe I will just be grateful for where I am right now and not put off living the life of my dreams. We do have a nice home, we do have 1/3 of an acre. We do have great southern exposure, some people would Kill for that who want to grow food. I do have a mini orchard started, strawberries, raspberries, a nice garden that most people would be thrilled to have.....and the chickens....well they will come. The bees too. Yeah, I may not be able to have goats, or a cow, but hey maybe my sweet 11 year old can finally have that bunny she has been talking about....they produce great garden fertilizer I hear. Also, while I'm busy being grateful and happy maybe another farm will come our way. If I have learned anything by now it is that dreams come true. Often not in the time frame that we want or desire but if we trust and let go and are grateful they come....and they are even better than we could ever dream them too. That is the Universe for you....law of attraction really at work.

So here I am. This is IT! as my sister C would say. I'm going to do my Urban homestead thing here. I'm going to harvest, process, cook our own food, talk about it, maybe teach those who are just starting to grow food and wanting to learn to live on less with the feeling of abundance. The less is more kind of mindset. I'd like to share the journey of parenting 8 beautiful children of all different ages and maybe inspire those who feel they are overwhelmed with just 2. It's all relative!

Also, I'm a soulful mama. I have learned so much in the last 10 years about being connected to everyone in the world. Strangely my son who is now 5, our sweet Will taught me that BEFORE he was even on the earth.

 I'm not talking about how connected we are now through the social media. I'm talking about connecting via soul net...not internet...although right now that's helpful. I believe  I am a spirit living this earthly experience and the contrast of our choices while on this earth is amazing. I just have to look at all I have been given to know that already my dreams have come true. I read a lot of soulful books with my Sacred sister's book club and I am at a place where I want to connect with others around the world. Do you want to be my sacred sister? We are all sisters no matter our background, or our beliefs. I believe we are vibrating really fast right now at a soul level. We parents are raising the next generation of children and hopefully they will create a peaceful, healthier planet. That makes me joy filled. That brings the Hope back into heart.

So that's about it for tonight...the start of my blog, This is IT! The beginning of a new dream. Stay tuned and thanks for reading. I will leave you with one of my favourite poems.

May you be well, peaceful and happy.
Blessings from Hope

Hope is the Thing with Feathers by Emily Dickinson

Hope is the thing with feathers
that perches in the soul
And sings the tune without the words
And never stops at all

And sweetet in the Gale is heard
And sore must be the storm
That could abash the little bird
That kept so many warm

I've heard it in the chilliest land
And on the strangest Sea
Yet never in Extremity
It asked a crumb-of me


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