' Tis the Gift to be Simple....Matrimonial Cake

               

'Tis the gift to be simple,
'tis the gift to be free,
'tis the gift to come down
where we ought to be,
and when we find ourselves in the place just right,
'twill be in the valley of love and delight.
When true simplicity is gained
to bow and to bend we shan't be ashamed,
to turn, turn, will be our delight
till by turning, turning we come round right.

---

Words: Shaker song, eighteenth century  

   Hellooo!

I'm emerging from the depths of decluttering, to say Hi and to share a few thoughts. First, de-cluttering is hard. At least, that's what it feels like as I move room to room, paring down our stuff, while humming the above Shaker song and also continuing to keep all the balls of normal life up in the air. Continuing to be there for our kids; feeding them, keeping them in clean clothes, making sure they are on top of their homework and all the upcoming events that are in line, from a swimming competition this weekend to yet another basketball tournament, an upcoming piano and voice festival and finally a music exam.

Tonight when my 12 year old daughter asked, "Mom, when are you going to change my sheets?...it's been like 3 weeks!" Well, first it hasn't been three weeks, two at the most and I replied, "don't you go to bed clean every night after your nightly bath?" Just saying. It's hard keeping the train rolling, while taking time to chuck off certain items to lighten our load.

I'm happy to say, that this week I took a car load of "stuff" to our local charity organization and another load to the dump, While 90% of the dump load was garden waste from debris I couldn't cram into my compost bins, it was still letting go of stuff. Believe me, I had thoughts of hoarding those wonderful bags of leaves and garden waste, etc. but one can only keep so many bags of decomposing debris without neighbours starting to look at your stock pile with wonder. Besides, our district chips up all the garden waste and turns it into mulch, so that trip made me feel okay. Still, there are heaps of things to go through and spring is flying by.  I just came in from outside and noticed that there are little buds on the forsythia tree and that is the first sign of spring in our area.

Spring is here when the forsythia tree next to our House blooms...it will be early this year

Another thing that has been preoccupying my time this week is finishing reading, or rather re-reading the book, "Siddhartha," by Hermann Hesse. It's my turn to host our sacred circle book club this month. To be precise tomorrow night.  I have already read this sweet, little classic book that was written decades ago about the life of Siddhartha, aka, Buddha but I wanted to go over it one more time since it was my selection.

 




I'm so proud that this month, I found an e book AND an audio book on line, so I didn't have to purchase a new book and then decide what to do with it. Even though this is a great read, it's one that I don't think I would want to own and I certainly don't need another book to sort through. Being frugal, sustainable, and with a minimalistic mindset makes me so thrilled. It's these little steps I'm taking, that keep me believing it's possible for us to downsize, enjoying more life with less stuff.

I thought the message from the book was also timely, as the story of Buddha's life reinforces my minimalistic path and the belief that everything we need to be happy is within us at all times. Part of the suffering we experience on this earth has to do with material possessions, wanting to own them, taking care of them, letting go of them, etc. Why do we put ourselves through that?
 


 When I think about how diverse this blog post already is it makes me laugh. First, I start my post with a picture of a farm house which to me says, "peaceful times." Anyone that has a tire swing in their yard knows how to enjoy the sweetness of just swinging through life. Then I have the lyrics to the Shaker's little hymnal, "Tis a Gift to be Simple." Finally, I bring in thoughts about Buddha. But you know what? All life is tied together. Everything is connected. We have fought wars on this earth because of differences in beliefs, opinions and the ludicrously is, we are all talking the same truth but get caught up in semantics.

But that is a philosophical discussion for another time, however some of the ideas that Buddha presented, is certainly appropriate for my minimalistic mindset towards simplicity. As you know, I've been talking about de-cluttering and I have to tell you how my husband and I are approaching the task is totally different. It's interesting really, since he is a very focused, get one job at a time done person and I am used to multi-tasking. Wars have not been fought thankfully because, we are after all moving in the same direction but we have had to discuss how that is going to look.

For instance, my husband wants to go into a room and get rid all the superfluous items. He feels that would be the most efficient approach. HOWEVER, I want to go into a room and sort through our stuff, while cleaning the items that are to be kept, along with doing any repairs to the room itself. ie; paint inside the cupboards in our family room before putting the toys, CD's back (although I'm still debating on whether we even need CD's any longer now that we have our i Pods and download any music we want) but you get the idea.

What we have decided to do for now is divide and conquer.  He has tackled the garage and the den so far and I have done our laundry room and kitchen....well, I'm still working in the kitchen. I was listening to the audio book of Siddhartha while I was cleaning the drawers last night. Did you know you could listen to a piece of classic literature or even learn a whole new language while cleaning and de-cluttering. Amazing!

 It can be done!

We are making some headway though and a few thoughts have come to light which I wanted to share with you if you are starting on this journey too. It's one thing to get down to sifting through the stuff and deciding what is going to be kept, donated, recycled or thrown away...but it's the stuff with emotions where it really gets hard.

If you have a partner, discuss how de-cluttering looks to them. How do they want to tackle the task and what is the time frame they see as being appropriate for such a feat. You have to set limits and really limits are what minimalism is all about isn't it? In all aspects of our life, how much stuff you need around you, how many commitments you are willing to take on, how much food you want to eat, how much exercise. Well, it's all a decision of what feels right for you so that you can maximize your enjoyment of life.

Some compromises may be required.

This takes me back to a story my mom used to lament over. It was a time when my Dad took a load of stuff to the dump without her consideration. There were things he threw out that bothered her for a long time.

One, was a beautiful wicker, antique doll buggy. She loved it and sadly Dad didn't think of it as special or antique. He just saw it as clutter and old when he took it to the dump. (now since I wasn't ever able to check that out with my dad that is just an assumption from what my mother relayed to me)

In my childhood memory banks, I recall fondly wearing long dresses and cast off, high heeled shoes and pushing my babies around the yard in this buggy. Maybe, since I was her youngest, holding onto this buggy represented holding onto having babies and young children.

This story touched me so deeply that when our oldest daughter was little, I started looking for a wicker buggy to give her. I finally found one and sewed bedding for the buggy and found the perfect baby doll to put inside. The Christmas that Alyssa was 2 3/4 years old, not only did she receive this new buggy and baby doll, but 5 days before Christmas her new baby brother, Clark arrived. When he was newborn we used to put him in the wicker buggy and push him around.

Here's the wicker doll buggy that I bought for Alyssa's Christmas present 22 years ago. She was also a new big sister that Christmas to her baby brother, Clark. We were shocked when we heard, "It's a Boy." (in those days they didn't tell you the gender before birth) and we had to scramble for a bit to find a perfect name for our new son. He carries my maiden name, "Clark"...since my Dad had passed away and had had only daughters. (as if that isn't enough but in those days carrying a name forward was important...in some cultures it may still be that way.) We thought it would be a tribute to give our first son, my Dad's surname. ANYWAY....the name we had chosen for our planned second daughter was given to Alyssa's doll, who is still in the buggy to this day...."Chelsea Anne."

Guess what? 22 years later, we still have this buggy...but now I have to decide what to do with it. Do I keep it for Alyssa who has assured me that children are not in her future. She never was the baby doll type of person anyway and although she liked her brother just fine, she really wasn't impressed with his baby years...or the 6 other siblings that followed afterwards. The little girls are currently playing with the buggy and love to push Chelsea Anne around but there will come a time when we have to decide...."what do we do with the buggy?"

Anyway,  I digress AGAIN, the point is, I now understand why Dad took that old buggy to the dump and I'm sure it wasn't in the kind of condition that our wicker buggy is currently in. It takes a lot of energy to decide what to do with our belongings, when we do decide to let them go....maybe the dump wasn't the best place for that old buggy, but Dad didn't have tons of time to carefully weigh the options and in those days there weren't the places there are today to recycle and appreciate old things. Everyone in those days had old stuff. He did what he needed to do to create more space in our small home so that we could live a richer life. Thanks Dad for teaching me that lesson by example.

It wasn't long after this, that my Dad was killed in a truck accident and a year after he passed away, my mom moved us out of our hometown of Hope, leaving my 2 oldest sisters to stay in our home until it sold. (One sister had graduated and had started working at the local bank and the other sister was left to finish high school in the town she had grown up in) I was too young to remember how mom moved us but she had to deal with all our stuff somehow. She remained a bit of a collector all her life, although I won't say she was a hoarder because she kept everything looking very nice but in some circles, they would say she had problems with letting go of  material things. I think that was quite common when you came from the depression era though. Books were one since she loved to read. Sentimental items were another. Tough stuff.

I know how I view our belongings is shadowed by how my parents dealt with their stuff. With this in mind, I was VERY conscious of how I approached my twin daughters the other day when I asked them to come and look at a basket, over flowing with stuffed animals. I talked to them about how they had so many lovies in the basket that you couldn't even see them all. We talked about how they didn't play with most of them and I told them about other children in the world, who didn't have any lovies at all. I asked them if they felt they could part with any of them. "Which ones are your absolute favourites?" I asked.

Of course, since they are three, four in May, every single lovie was special. I was very careful in helping them choose their favourites. We took time to eliminate the ones they didn't have a connection with.  I asked them if they thought they could say good bye to the ones that weren't as special and we could give them to other children to love. They nodded their heads solemnly. We kept the bunnies, since the girls were born in the year of the rabbit (Chinese zodiac) and bunnies happen to not only be a favourite of their's but I know if my mom were alive, she would have said, "oh keep the bunnies."

And that brings me to another story from my mother's childhood. She was a child during the depression but her family was fortunate to live on a farm and they had chickens and rabbits. She loved the bunnies and for a long time, didn't make the connection that often after having a delicious Sunday dinner of "chicken," one of her bunnies would coincidentally go missing. I think one of her older brothers finally clued her in...boys!

So we kept the bunnies in the basket but several other non-describt lovies made it to the give a way box. After a final farewell, I moved them quickly out to the garage since I knew if the girls saw them again, they would suddenly feel they would HAVE to sleep with one or all of them that night.

So with another week almost behind me on my minimalism journey, I have a few more tips to share.

Be considerate with your spouse regarding how they are letting go of their possessions. We all have a past and it's good to be gentle and give others space to let go in their own time. That the truth for them is the same truth for you, but it may just look different. Compromise with compassion. (this from Buddha's teachings...the compassion part and a reminder that we are all connected....and perfect just as we are)

And if you have children, get them involved and help them to see that letting go isn't painful but can be enlightening. Can be filled with joy. Hopefully, they can carry some wonderful childhood memories down the road to pass on to their children and it will look like this; People, not things are important. Happiness is within, memories are not in our belongings. They are in our hearts.

Well, I will close but I wanted to share my recipe for Date Squares before I say good night....for yes, it is now evening.

This is  my mom's recipe. I have tried to make it exactly how she did over the years but it never tastes exactly the same. I don't know what she did differently...maybe it was just the love she put into each pan. You know how things always taste better when they are made just for you? Maybe it was in the actual tin pan that she cooked her squares in (old, dark and well used) and I use a glass pan? Maybe the quality of ingredients is different but it's still an amazing recipe.

So Mom and Dad, this is for you. "I'm laying up my treasures in heaven" and all that but until then, I'm making date squares and remembering you both with love. 

Ethel's Date Squares
or what she liked to call her Matrimonial Cake


Ingredients

2 cups rolled oats
2 cups flour...for a great texture use 1/2 white and 1/2 whole wheat
1 cup brown sugar
1 cup butter
1/2 tsp baking soda
1 tsp baking powder
2 tsp cinnamon (this is my addition...my mom didn't use this)
pinch of salt

Filling
1 pound of dates
2 cups of water
1/2 cup of orange juice....or do what I do and juice a whole orange
pinch of salt
orange rind...about 1 tbsp

Directions

Put all the filling ingredients into a medium saucepan and bring to a rolling boil. Turn down to a simmer for about 20 minutes and then take a potato masher and break the dates so the mixture is smooth and thick. Turn off the heat and let the filling thicken while you are making the bottom and top layer.

In a large bowl, add all the dry ingredients. Add cut up butter (best if the butter is cold) then with a pastry mixer or two knives, continue to cut the butter into the mixture until it's all well combined.

Press 1/2 of the flour/butter mixture into a 13x9 lightly greased pan. Add and spread all of the filling mixture and finally top it with the other 1/2 of the flour/butter mixture. Pat with a fork.

Bake in an oven 325 degrees if using a glass pan or 350 degrees if using a metal pan. Bake for 30 minutes until the edge is lightly brown.

Let it cool and set and then cut into squares. I usually put 1/2 of these squares into the freezer or they will be gone within the day.....they are really great for book club night meetings too.

For instance, I made this today for my book club meeting and it's almost gone....but oh so good. If you love dates, I hope you will try this recipe and think of my mom who loved bunnies, babies, books, her family...and my Dad. This coming Saturday, will be the 3rd anniversary since Mom passed away. Another reminder how fleeting this earth journey is, and how stuff just isn't important.

My mom and Dad and my Dad's fav squares.....served on my mom's Forget Me Not china

What do you do with old recipes written out in your mother's writing? As you can see, I've loved this recipe for years but the recipe card is not my mom...she is in my heart and every time I make this recipe she is telling me the story of how much my Dad loved these squares......they are delicious!

So as I leave you, with maybe a recipe to try out, or an inspiration to clear out the clutter in your kitchen, (do you really need five spring form pans, as my dear friend K just mentioned she discovered in her kitchen recently?) maybe you can set up your computer in your kitchen and listen to the audio version of the book, "Siddhartha," by Hermann Hesse. Here's the link, if you are interested in listening and remembering that what you think, you become. We all have the seeds of Buddha inside of us. We are all perfect, even as we sit amongst all our stuff. It is a good way to practise the art of letting go gracefully.

I wrote this quote on our chalk board for our Siddhartha meeting tomorrow night...."what we think, we become."

If you can't see the link to the Siddhartha audio book below, click this hyperlink.

 Wish you could join me during our sacred circle book club tomorrow night but maybe you can listen to the story and tell me what you think of this classic little book about Buddha's life.

Until we meet again, may you be well, happy and peaceful.

Blessings from Hope

A final youtube video....the song, "Tis a gift to be simple" by Yo Yo Ma and Alison Krause.....love, LOVE the cello and Alison's voice is beautiful.........good night dear blog friends

Starting the Minimalist Journey, TIP # 1 & 2, and Spicy Bran Muffins

                   

Thanks for popping in as I'm excited to share a few tips I have discovered on my early "moments" towards minimalism. The first one became very apparent to me yesterday when I woke up bleary eyed from a brief four hours of sleep the night before.  (I had been writing my first blog about minimalism and finally posted it at 3 am)

Some people have asked me where I find time to write with our busy life with currently 6 kids in our home and two others that I try to stay connected to outside the home. Well.....

Like anything that is important, I find the time. I love to write and although for most of my life as a mom, I have put my needs at the bottom of the list, over the last decade I have learned that this doesn't have to be the case.In fact, having this mindset is actually detrimental to our family as I get crabby when my needs haven't been met. I've put myself last for so long however that even a tiny bit of "me time" can fill my bucket to over flowing.

I have found time over the years to go to my yoga classes, take a few evening courses, and even have the occasional long walk all alone.  On days when the kids and house needed more attention, even doing a few yoga poses or sun salutations perked me up. My writing though is something that I really have to make a concerted effort to create time for daily/weekly, in order to release all the ideas and thoughts ready to erupt from my brain.

I paid the price yesterday though when I was surviving, yes that is an appropriate word for yesterday on only four hours of sleep. And like any day around here, it was jam packed and I needed to really be in the game.

Have you ever noticed that when you don't get enough sleep, nothing seems to go right for you. Life is full of obstacles and shadowed with difficult moments, almost like the fog that clouds your brain. Things that you normally find solutions to in milli-seconds takes minutes, or longer.

Therefore, my TIP # 1 for beginning a minimalist journey is to NOT be minimal with regards to your sleep. This is one area that you need a huge amount. A bit ironic, that on the path to being a minimalist, you NEED something big in your life. But yes, sleep is one of them.

As I whipped through the house while the girls were at preschool and perhaps "whipped" isn't the best verb to describe the way I cleaned the house yesterday morning, I took a large basket with me so I could gather up things on my path that I knew for SURE we didn't need any longer. I noticed that my decisions for those things were slower than I believe I could have been, had I been well rested. Plus, my pace was definitely slower than my usual speedy, efficient self.

As a previous, fitness instructor, I have a mind set that my house cleaning can be a form of work out. As I bend down to reach for something, I do a squat, as I travel up the stairs, I run, sometimes taking two steps to really work my legs and give me a burst of cardio. When I'm making beds, I lift the sheets way up high, shaking them to air them out but also working my arms and shoulders. Okay, you get the idea and often people have said to me, after hearing I have 8 kids, "wow, you're in great shape." I don't really know what they expect a mom with many kids to look like, but I often reply with a laugh, "my kids are my personal trainers and having a large family requires more work so that may explain why I may appear fit."

I digress, the point is, that optimum sleep is paramount, if one is to be an efficient minimalist.

The other thing I also noticed was that I wasn't eating the best. The morning started with me just grabbing an apple as I headed out the door taking Clark to the University bus, then back home to gather up the others, taking Harrison to high school and then Grace and Will to elementary school (yes, I know not very environmentally conscious/green, all that driving, but Grace was downhill skiing with her class yesterday and she had a lot of gear to take to school) and finally I had to take the little two to preschool. Upon returning home, AT LAST, since I was moving slower than usual, I didn't stop for a good breakfast but plowed right into the work. Cleaning the kitchen, gathering up laundry, making beds. Yes, not eating... is not the best idea.

Since Will had invited a friend over after school, I made special oatmeal cookies, loaded with trail mix type filling. I also made a large snack plate to be brought out of the fridge when they arrived home later in the day. It had cut up veggies and fruit, some crackers and cheese and of course several of these large cookies on the plate. It was close to 11 am so I raced back to preschool.

After collecting the little girls, we went to the recycling center to drop off all the bottles we had accumulated and then the library where many of the books on minimalism were on on hold for me.  Can I say enough about our library? I LOVE IT!....and although I love books, I can see that as long as I'm close to a library, I can let go of my books.

Here's what I picked up;



Yeah!.. the book above will be an easy read and down below is a link to one of this author's youtube videos.



The book above was written by the two guys I wrote about in my last post....although they don't share the same lifestyle that I have (with a large family) I really like them. They remind me of my nephew, E, who lives in Vancouver in Yale town and enjoys a lovely very urban lifestyle. (he also has a minimalistic approach since he has a studio apartment. 


The book above is written by a woman who is a mom like me....I listened to an interview she gave on the web and she had such a down to earth manner that I really resonated with....I'm looking forward to reading her book....

and because I knew that part of my quest for minimalism had to do with my diet, I also picked up these books as well.
  AND
 
I love Deepak....as you know I participate in all the group meditations that he and Oprah put on....there is one coming up again in March and the focus will be on "success." Check out the Chopra's center to sign up.


After lunch (I fed the little girls but didn't stop to eat) we went to pick up our University son and brought him home as he was going to greet Will and his friend V, after school, while I picked up Harrison from high school, collect Grace and all her ski stuff and then take her to her swim club session. To keep me going, as I was in and out of the house driving kids around, I grabbed a few of the cookies I made and a little bowl of fruit and veggies.

When I finally came home, as I was making dinner, I ate another cookies, okay, maybe two. Then, since I was still starving, I basically inhaled dinner not really "aware" of what was going in my mouth as I chewed and as we all hurriedly talked about  the things each of us had on our plate for the evening.

 After dinner as I was cleaning up, I knew I still had a full evening ahead with bathing the little kids, telling stories, working with Will on his reading, checking in with Grace on her homework, tucking in little people, making lunches, you get the picture and since I was running out of steam, I opened the box of chocolates that D had given me for Valentines as I was cleaning up the kitchen....I ate one chocolate and then two and finally three!!!

I said goodbye to Harrison, with a mouthful of chocolate. He was off to play another basketball game and since I had attended the one the night before, I let David see last night's game. Then after the game, Harrison had asked if he could go to the February Valentine's dance at school. Thank heavens I didn't have to get him to those activities but since my number one helper, "my husband" was out for the evening, it was up to me to pick up the slack. So to keep going, my body ate another chocolate as I yelled for Will to start the bath water running.

That brings me to TIP #2 beginning the minimalism journey. After reading everything I just wrote, you probably are thinking tip #2should be ridding ourselves of activities....but no...that will have to be something we consider down the road. In these early days, my tip # 2 is, prepare healthy meals, eat slowly, savour your food and even if you have a busy day like I had yesterday, be mindful of the moments when you are eating.

On this journey, I want minimalism to create fuller, richer moments in every aspect of my life and getting sufficient sleep and eating consciously, with joy for I do love food, these must be the foundation for my life to flourish.

 No matter your lifestyle, I would think this would be the base for a good life but in addition to North Americans having a lot of stuff cluttering up their homes, I think it's safe to say that we as a society don't get enough sleep. We certainly don't have the best eating habits. (what do you think?)

After I put the little ones to bed, I quickly performed all the evening chores I needed to do in order to allow our morning to flow smoother. Then exhausted, I went to bed. Even though I was very tired, I started reading the new book I had picked up from the library, "Clutterfree with Kids," by Joshua Becker. While it was very interesting, by 9:15 my eyes were really heavy. I set the book down, sprayed some lavender mist on my pillow that my sister C had given me, put some peppermint drops from Saje that my other sister B had given to me (because I used to be addicted to Vicks under my nose at bedtime....a story for another day about clearing up our addictions) and I dropped off to a blissful, deep sleep. Oh sweet dreams.

 

I woke up this morning refreshed and ready and excited to start a new day. The first thing I did today was take my green powder drink, make some oatmeal/quinoa cereal and I brewed a pot of Mother's Helper tea from David's Tea and while I sipped my first cup, I made some bran muffins. The cookie jar is still packed with the cookies I made yesterday but today, I 'm going to have a good bran muffin as a conscious, well deserved snack before we do the piano and voice lessons, the basketball practise etc. (yes we do have to do something about the activities)

As I write this blog, it's later in the morning, I've done my morning chores and while the girls play with their dollhouse, I thought I would pass on these two tips to you.

      Get enough sleep and eat healthy meals and snacks

Well I'm off to do some deeper cleaning with a large basket under my arm. My intention is to start my deep cleaning with the thought, "do I need this and do I love it?" foremost in my brain. Wish me luck!




Hey and before I close I thought I would share the bran muffin recipe I have been using for years. It was the first muffin recipe that I ever made as a newly married woman. I hope you like it too and in a way, it's kind of appropriate for the minimalism path since it clears out your colon REALLY well. Nothing like the feeling of cleaned out inside too right?...okay maybe too much information but hey.....when we start talking about paring down, shouldn't we also be thinking of what is inside us as well?




Hope's Minimalism Bran Muffins

11/4 cup of flour....I use 3/4 cup of whole wheat flour and 1/2 cup of white flour
11/2 tsp baking powder
1/2 baking soda
1/4 salt
1 tsp ground cinnamon
1/2 ground nutmeg
1/4 all spice
11/4 cup milk.....almond, rice, cow...whatever you prefer...I like almond
1/4 vegetable oil....or coconut is great too
1/3 cup molasses
1 egg
1/2 raisins
11/2 cup of a bran type cereal......I have used All Bran and that is I believe where I got this recipe years ago....of the cereal box


1. Mix all the dry ingredients together

2. In a large bowl, combine cereal and milk. Let stand 4 minutes or until cereal is softened. Add oil, molasses and egg. Beat well. Stir in raisins.

3. Add flour mixture, stirring just until combined. Portion batter evenly into 12 lightly greased muffin-pan cups.

4. Bake at 400°F about 20 minutes or until the toothpick comes out clean

 

These muffins will help keep things moving.....I also like to sprinkle some ground flax on top of the muffins before they go into the oven and that really helps me stay regular. 

Oh....and one final tip as it goes with helping things in your colon get flushed out....drink water~as you are working through your stuff. In fact, often during the clean up, you may reach for food as a distraction, but instead, drink a full glass of water, nice and slow and appreciate how far you have already come. Be SIMPLY GRATEFUL.

If you want some more minimalist inspiration, check out this youtube video by Joshua Becker (more joy on owning less) who wrote the book that I'm currently reading, "Clutterfree with Kids". He has a typical American family with 2 kids and is now a minimalist. (Note: he does talk about his spirituality in the longer video above...click on the hyperlink above to see it. When he references God etc, it may be interesting to watch your reaction. For me.....I think the road to minimalism can create more time for us to contemplate our connection to Source and our soul's journey....unless you don't want to that is....as my older son says.....becoming minimalist can allow more time for no reflection at all.....just being)

Well, I'm off to tackle my spice cupboard....what are you working on?

 

Until we meet again, may you be well, happy and peaceful.

Blessings from Hope

   

Living Large with Minimalism

                  

                           
‘Drink your tea slowly and reverently, as if it is the axis on which the world earth revolves – slowly, evenly, without rushing toward the future. Live the actual moment.’ ~Thich Nhat Hanh




Last year, in my spare moments, I started to Google simplicity. I visited our local library seeking every book they had on the subject. I'm at a place in my life where many of my friends are starting to downsize because their youngest child/children are leaving the nest and although we are YEARS away from our youngest leaving home, a large part of me wants to shift and seek a richer lifestyle. My heart desires less stuff so we can experience more life.

In my quest, I wanted to be inspired with ideas to create a more meaningful lifestyle to raise our younger children. Although our intention was good while raising our older kids, looking back I see that it was centered on a busy, consumer oriented life. We have achieved the "Canadian/American" dream. We have a large home with a pool, the children attend excellent schools and have all sorts of  enrichment type activities. We want for nothing, and yet, I feel like A LOT is lacking.

For the last several years I knew that the stuff we had accumulated, which was to make life easier and more fun, wasn't making us any more joy filled. In fact, it caused more stress since things always need to be repaired, cleaned and maintained. In my quest to look for an alternative path, I was amazed to find that many people all over the world are intensely interested in the same sort of thing. It's like we are all waking up and seeing that we have bought a used bill of goods. More is less.

During my search, I stumbled across people who live in "Tiny Houses." These are small houses (usually under 300 square ft) that normally wouldn't meet building standards but since they are built on trailer beds with wheels, they do not fall under normal building codes but rather under vehicle codes. The people who choose this lifestyle usually have one thing in common; they want more life and less stuff.

I love to take virtual tours of these tiny houses and often lay in bed at night dreaming of how much freedom this would create in my life if we had less square footage. Just imagine, it would take probably minutes to wash a few dishes, make a bed or two (there are even small families in these houses) and clean the tiny, closet like bathroom. Just think, it would be hard to lose anything in this size of house! To me this is luxury living. MAYBE it's not your idea of nirvana, but there is a huge part of me that desires this life style.

The dream goes back to when my Dad converted a back yard shed and turned it into my playhouse. There was a real stove and cupboards for my little dishes and my baby dolls seemed to really love it there too. I would take dirt and leaves and cook amazing meals on my stove. Outside my house was our garden with butterflies flitting around and there were always a cat or two hanging around, begging to curl up in my lap. Now that is heaven to me.

                                                        
   

Sigh!

What has propelled me to start thinking seriously about living more simply? Well......

A few things have, let's say, been accumulating in my home which is causing some discontent and distress. First, the growing pile of singular socks in my laundry room is driving me wild. Do you have this in your house? Where does the other matching sock go? My kids say that my washer must eat them. I think the likely situation is that the sock attaches itself to another piece of clothing, (since I don't use static fighting fabric sheets.....I just throw in a lavender soaked rag instead) and then gets put away in someones drawer never to be seen again. (And I have to stress here, there are not just a few socks but a huge pile of singular socks waiting for their partner to appear.) And socks are expensive...especially basketball socks, YIKES!



Also, it seems to take longer and longer each morning to put our house in any semblance of order and that is even when I have asked each child to make their bed and bring their laundry to the wash basket. I don't know if  I'm slowing down but most mornings I feel as if I'm walking through sludge, going room to room straightening things up.

As I sort through my laundry looking for missing socks, I have been pondering my life.



                                       



I'm sure my niece, N, who is an efficiency expert with her company would say, "Auntie, the problem is with the number of kids you have." Hmmmm.... I'm just assuming here of course, but I'm sure most people would say, how can you have a simple life with 8 kids? I did try to Google simple living with a large family and you know what I found? Not much.

So it looks like I'm leading the pack or perhaps there are large families out there but they are having so much fun enjoying living simply, that they don't see the need to reach out and share their secrets. Maybe, living large "with minimalism" is an oxymoron, but my gut says that there really isn't a huge contradiction here after all. I think it's one and the same. Living large is what being a minimalist is all about. We want more LIFE. And I guess since I have 8 kids, it is a play on words but I think it's possible to have a large family and live simply. I'm kind of excited to share this journey with you.....if you are interested in what we are doing that is.

 I did find one book on our library's list that may help me and once it comes in and I have a chance to read it, I will share the contents with you. I can't wait!

                                                                            


When 2015 began, I knew I was going to continue to move in the direction of being more sustainable, by growing a large garden, using our resources with care, raising children who are earth conscious but I had no idea that only 2 months into the year, I would be thinking of becoming a minimalist.

A few things have shifted my thinking. First, as I meditate more and feel a greater connection to my soul, I feel expansive. I don't need things or a large home to feel happy any longer. I want more time to just be in THAT space. Also, I want more time just being with those I love.

It's the simple moments that are precious....the girls sitting on the window seat  in awe of another snow day.

Another inspiration is with regards to our oldest daughter Alyssa. If you read my blog, you know she left last August to teach over in the U.K. As I said goodbye to her at the airport, she was pulling two connected suitcases and had a carry on slung over her shoulder.

I helped her wash and iron the clothes she carefully selected, so I know what she packed. A lot of black. Black pants, tights, a few black dresses, a black skirt and then a stack of different shirts to coordinate with all the bottoms. For the next two years these will be her only possessions. What she desires is experiences. Where is she right now? On her school's break in Paris.

This is all Alyssa is going to have for possessions for the next two years....keep in mind all her career clothes are in these suitcases along with her tablet, her computer, her camera. Could you live out of two suitcases for 2 years? She didn't even take a book....and she is a book LOVER!

Alyssa in her black London Fog coat ...she is capturing life in Europe

Then our son Mitchell, who is away at University, came home last week for a part of his reading week. He was here for 6 nights and 5 full days and all he brought with him were one pair of pants, two t-shirts, a plaid shirt, a jean jacket and a comfy pair of jersey type pants that he wore to relax and sleep in. He had a great week visiting with his old school friends, he went up skiing with the family, he went to his little brother's music class and said hello to his old guitar teacher and he even cheered his 16 year old brother, Harrison on during one of his basketball games.We watched movies together and I made many of his favourite meals and desserts.

Mitchell being silly with his little sisters.."making memories"

We had a wonderful week full of fun and made some lasting memories but as he walked up the driveway with only a backpack it occurred to me that my older children have the right idea. They are both living life fully and not encumbered with stuff. Since Mitchell brought only a few items home, there was nothing to maintain and it was a breeze for him to pack again. Mid week, I did throw his clothes in the wash with the rest of the family's and I think I lost one of his socks too, but other than that there was no effort involved.

Then finally, I was thinking about how I'm about to embark on my yearly, intense spring cleaning session.




 Ask the kids how gruelling it is and they will assure you that they would rather be anywhere else but in our house for spring cleaning. I go room to room, de-clutter, clean what items are left and organize our belongings so that there a place for everything. (you know that saying....)




Then I do a deep cleaning in each room. This process normally takes at least a month since my day to day life is usually spent doing our usual maintenance and household upkeep. And finally I perform a space clearing ceremony in our house. I go room to room with some sage/lavender smudge sticks, a feather, a bell, flowers, etc and I bless our home.








Once I have finished with the interior, I take that spring cleaning energy out into the yard. I prune all our shrubs, trees, rake the grass, pick up the debris leftover from winter, sweep all the walkways and driveway. I wash all the windows on the outside of the house and clean our little front yard pond while also setting out our water feature fountain at the front door.

Then I take out all our stored outdoor furniture and set them up; two patio table/umbrella and chair sets, our front yard Adirondack chairs, our red ones for the backyard fire pit, and then I haven't even started talking about the kids tiny house or the garden/compost (or David opening up our pool and cleaning the hot tub for spring)....I'm exhausted just writing this and I'm sure I forgot a lot.........So yeah.....I wish the little house below were MY HOUSE.

Our kids playhouse and playground....what would life be like if this was where we lived?.....some families in the world do live in spaces this small.

Does all this sound familiar to you too? If you have been thinking that you want more life and less stuff too, then we are kindred spirits. Let me share a few really cool Youtube videos that I discovered recently. Maybe you will join me and others around the world in paring down and living more.

 



It's not just our stuff, it's our thoughts, it's the things we say "yes," but really want to say, "sorry, no." It's the activities we register our children in, creating another generation of people who don't know how to slow down. It's even as simple as our breathing. When was the last time you took a really deep, slow breath?...instead of tons of shallow ones?

Well, I've been staying up late listening to some really wise people talk about the minimalist movement and I hope they inspire you to start on a new path...if you aren't already there.

First, I found these two guys, Joshua Fields Millburn & Ryan Nicodemus. They had a really powerful TEDx talk, called, "A Rich life with Less Stuff." (click on the hyper-link below) They also have a web site called, "TheMinimalist.com.



If you want some inspiration check out this video by The Minimalists, (A Rich life with less stuff)

And another one is with Angela Horn (I love her accent) called, "The less you own, the more you have." This video REALLY resonated with me as she starts her talk reflecting on clearing out her mother and father's family home. After my mom passed away 3 years ago this month, I started looking at all of my stuff with a new light and now ask myself, "what do I want to leave my kids to  go through after I'm gone?"

Check out Angela's videos below or better yet, this hyperlink to the TEDx talk she gave in Capetown....... "Less you own the more you have. In this video she shares the two steps that you need to make towards having more.

1) Clear the clutter
2) Stop buying new stuff

Well, enough said. Ha! When I think about minimalism, I want it to relate to EVERY aspect of my life. Not just stuff. I want less thoughts, more love and peace.

Will you join me in the ranks of people all over the world who are ditching the "Dream" and working in the direction of a simpler more fulfilling life? It starts with refusing to bring more stuff into your home, while working slowly through the belongings you do own. While you do, think about this, if this was your last day on earth, how would you want to spend it? With the stuff you own or with the people you love?

Are you in"
Stay tuned as I share some things that we will be doing around our home.


Until we meet again, may you be well, happy and peaceful.

Blessings from Hope

A Hero's Journey....and Carrot Cake

“Not all those who wander are lost.”
― J.R.R. Tolkien, The Fellowship of the Ring
 
As you may or may not know, I'm a HUGE Lord of the Ring fan. Well, maybe not as massive a fan as my daughter Alyssa, who could probably teach a University level course on Tolkien's writing and Middle Earth history. She has been known to speak Elvish and when she performed her Irish Dance steps as a child/teen, I could almost see the Elves and Hobbits dancing beside her as her curls bounced to the lilting Celtic music.

When she and her brother Clark, (she on piano and Clark on violin) used to play one of the songs from the movie, "In Dreams," I used to weep in sadness that we did not live in such a world or a time as is portrayed in Tolkien's literature. It was a time and place of innocence and magic. I'd like to think I did play a bit part in creating her passion for this literature, since I introduced her to Tolkien when she was around 11 or 12. My mom and I also kept her belief in faeries/elves and the like alive by surrounding her with faerie stories and music.

(If you are unable to see the video below, click on this hyperlink which will take you to the Lord of the Rings soundtrack, "In Dreams."....for inspiration to journey starts there)

I think of our dear daughter now, over in the U.K. teaching English to the English and I have to smile for she is finally living in a country steeped in history. A country where Tolkien was inspired to write his Middle Earth tales, she is starting her epic journey.

Teaching isn't the easiest thing to do when one is more comfortable behind the piano, behind a book, behind the camera, sitting in the corner observing.

 She pushes her comfort zone each day as she faces things that are hard and difficult. It may be modern times but courage and determination are needed. I think if Gandalf were really alive and well he would say, "Well done, Alyssa! Stay with the quest."

And when I look at another of our children, Mitchell, who was just home from University for part of his February reading week, my heart goes out to him as he often struggles trying to find his authentic self and the path that he must walk. I try to share mother wisdom with him but all the wisdom in my heart will not help him on his journey. Only he knows the way and it's my job to trust and let go that he will listen well to his heart and follow where it bids him to travel. I have lived long enough to know that it will turn out right.

In my own life, when my friends and family questioned many of my life choices; to leave a comfortable career, to have more children later in life than society deems prudent; to leave the city and move out to the country, I had to shut out those voices and go inward. I had to find my own path and keep following the signs along the way, encouraging me to stay true to myself. My life is now rich with what I love to do, care for my family, write, garden, and while many would not think this is a worthy life purpose, I know it is the way that I will grow as a soul.

What about you? Do you question your life's path? It's really simple to follow the road signs if you recognize the symbols along the way although they aren't always easy to discern. I remember trying to decide about a certain life choice years ago. The two doors were open wide but I just couldn't decide which one to walk through. I was praying for guidance daily. Minute to minute uttering the words, "help me with the direction to take," as my mantra.

Then one day as I was driving our children to their after school activities and of course we were in a hurry as usual, hoping that we wouldn't be late but of course we got behind a slow moving vehicle. I had to step on the brakes, take a deep breath and when I did, I realized the car in front of me had a bumper sticker in the rear that read, "Trust Comes First."

As soon as I read those words, I got shivers as if my guardian angel were sitting right beside me whispering the message directly into my ear. I knew what I had to do in that second. I let go of any fear that I had been holding onto and knew which door to walk through. I wanted to follow that car and when the driver finally stopped to say, "Thank you, as you have no idea how much your bumper sticker helped me today." Do you ever wonder why certain people or things are put on your path at a precise time? There are no coincidences in life. Everything happens for a reason but we aren't often listening or watching for guidance.

And so, while I continue on my hero's journey, a part of that is trusting that goodness will always prevail. That my children will be okay and that the messages that Tolkien wrote about in the Lord of the Rings and his other books have reached them. Every Christmas we have a tradition now of watching the movies together, often we are quoting the lines at the same time, they are entrenched in our memory.

 
(If unable to see the above, check this hyperlink to the Youtube video of Gandalf ..."All you need to decide is what to do with the time that is given to us."



While there are many lines from the book/movie that are profound, the above has to be my favourite, as it helps me to remember to live fully and never let fear take over.

And before I leave today, I wanted to share my Carrot Cake recipe with you, my dear readers because, well, at the end of a journey, one needs to find nourishment and comfort. Also, carrot cake happens to be one of my daughter Alyssa's favourite desserts. This recipe was given to me by my sister C, years ago and I have made hundreds of carrot cakes since then. Do we ever really realize how the smallest things we contribute and share can change the world? This simple, easy recipe has created moments for our family to stop on our path, celebrate life, restore ourselves and have the energy to carry on....like lembas bread.

 Thank you C  for this recipe. I hope it becomes a family fav for you too.




Hope's Carrot Cake

Ingredients

2 cups flour (1 cup white, 1 cup whole wheat flour)
2 cups sugar  (1 cup white, 1 cup brown sugar)
2 tsp baking soda
1/2 tsp salt
1 cup rapeseed oil or any light oil of your choice
2 tsp cinnamon
1 tsp all-spice
4 eggs
3 cups finely grated carrots (I don't use my food processor...I like grating by hand for this recipe)

Directions

1. Sift dry ingredients
2. Add oil to dry and stir really well...this is a thick mixture
3. Add eggs, one at a time until well combined
4. Add carrots and ensure blended well

5. Pour mixture into a lightly greased pan of your choice. (I use a bundt pan or a 9x13 pan)

Bake for 350 degrees for 45 to 50 minutes...if using a glass pan....bake at 325 degrees

Cream Cheese frosting
1- 4 ounce package or 1/2 of the large 8 ounce package
3 tsp milk
11/2 tsp sugar
8 tbsp of icing sugar
1/4 tsp salt
1/2 tsp vanilla
Blend cheese and milk then slowly add the additional ingredients until smooth

Adjust the amounts depending on whether you want a glaze or a thick icing on your cake

When the cake is cooled, ice with the above and sprinkle walnuts on top....Journey's End

I'm serving the cake on my mother's "Forget Me Not" china tea set....we all make such a difference in each other's lives

My beautiful son Mitchell, home for reading week...now back on his path

My darling daughter Alyssa, on her Hero's journey....this pic from.her day trip to Windsor Castle, Bath and Stonehenge

The next time you are wondering about your life purpose or whether you are on the right path,, all you have to do is trust that everything will become clear in time, let go...and  ENJOY.

YOU are the hero in your own journey!

(If you can't see the Youtube video above...click here for the video of "Into the West" from Lord of the Rings)



Until we meet again, may you be well, happy and peaceful.

Gandalf and Pippin from the Return of the King...."The Journey Does Not End Here."

Blessings from Hope