I remember when our first baby Alyssa Rae was born and I was alone with her day in and day out. All alone. After years of working in an busy office setting, surrounded by co-workers, clients and daily expectations, all of a sudden the days stretched out like an eternity.
There was just she and me, I and her, sharing our days. I wished I had told her more what a beautiful baby she was, how special she was, how proud I was of her. I wished I had told her she was perfect just as she was and I hadn't felt so driven over the years to register her into every activity available for babies, toddlers, preschoolers, school age, teens, etc. just so our days would be full and busy. I wished we had done nothing but enjoy the simplicity of her childhood and all the magic that was held within. That we had cuddled in bed lost in books, that we had gone on more nature walks and eaten popcorn for dinner, that we had sat dreaming together over tea, toast and jam.
Sadly, my childhood imprinted on her. The loss and grief I had experienced, settled on her heavily without any words spoken. I wanted her to experience everything I had desired as a child, yet little did I know the message she was receiving was, "she wasn't good enough, bright enough, talented enough." Without the extra curricular activities that she was registered in, she somehow felt less than as a result. My childhood fear filtered through her and she felt unworthy.
I wished I had taken the time to listen to her and what she wanted. I wished I had taken the time to tell her that just being my baby was enough. She wasn't even my baby after all, I was only her caretaker for awhile, but oh, she brought so much to my life when she arrived. It was immeasurable.
The moment she was born was the ONLY life lesson she ever needed to teach me and yet even now here she is, still "teaching" me by being out in the world, so brave and strong. Thanks Alyse, for sharing this beautiful YouTube video clip (blog friends see below) and inspiring me with your shining soul.
Alyssa, ready to take off and fly |
The hourglass has turned and my daughter is off to start her own life in the U.K. |
I love this video. (see below) Not just because of the powerful message, BUT I also love violin music. So much so, that I registered two of our sons in violin and one in cello and encouraged them to play for YEARS, just so I could be surrounded by my favourite instruments playing all the time. (My father played violin too) I like to believe that they appreciated learning to play these beautiful classical instruments but they have also told me to a degree, they continued to play to make me happy.
To my sons I say, keep playing your beautiful music, let it spill out of your luminous souls and guess what, you never have to worry about your bow hold again!
The last day the kids were all together before Alyssa left for the U.K. |
To all of my children, I say,
"YOU
are
LOVED "
Knowing that will echo out into eternity..................................................................................
And here now is, "The Maker"
(please note, for my blog friends who are using an Apple product, you may not be able to view this video, if so try the link above to the YouTube video, "The Maker"....I hope you can view it as it's AMAZING!)
To my dear blog friends, you ARE loved too.
Until I see you again, may you be well, peaceful and happy.
Blessings from Hope
Lee, your posts/blogs always feel like they are directed right to my heart and soul, this one especially, thank you. Love being a part of your life, xo Tamara
ReplyDeleteOh my dear BESTIE, thanks for checking out my blog. When I write, I try to write just to you....if you get my posts, then I'm hoping others will as well. Don't you think our purpose on earth is to touch each other...and of course support one another...you Always are my BEST cheerleader. Thanks for being on the path with me. blessings from lee
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