Havesting Food and Harvesting Memories

Don't you just love fall?

I know I was reluctant to greet this season, since I felt I hadn't experience enough summer....

But like any good friend who you haven't seen for a long time, you connect immediately and pick up where you left off.

Hello fall.

I'm so happy to see you again!

So much of the season makes me smile but lately the bounty of the harvest from our garden brings me the most JOY! I feel abundantly blessed when basket after basket of food comes into my kitchen, ready to be processed and stored away for the upcoming long, cold winter.

Even though I've had a garden for years now, I feel abundantly blessed every time I go outside. There is something so deeply fulfilling about growing your own food and feeding your family

I remember when I was just a small child, before my Dad died, living in our little, white clapboard house in Hope, my parents would drive up to Orchard country in early September and bring home boxes of peaches, pears, plums, and apples. Our small kitchen, always the heart of our home, with mom presiding in front of the sink, would be bustling with food preparation and canning. As the shelves of our pantry slowly filled, one jar after another with delicious peaches, pears, plums and applesauce to name a few, I felt safely wrapped in an envelope of abundance and gratitude.

We really didn't have much and were far from well off but having those shelves full of food and living in a loving family was EVERYTHING I needed.

 
In the old days, if you wanted to eat vegetables or have fruit in the winter, you had to put them up. Canning was the number one choice, since no power was needed to maintain the food's freshness...just a good 'ole pantry like we had or even better; a cold room. Nowadays we have the choice of canning, drying, freezing, storing or buying in a grocery store as needed.

Even if you aren't able to grow your own food, you can buy large quantities at low prices and either store them or process them. When I was at my local Super Store yesterday they were selling 10 pounds of beets, carrots and 20 pounds of potatoes for around $3.50 dollars each and if you had a cold storage area, you could easily store them and save some serious cash. 

Victoria loves to collect our eggs, today we have a whopper of a basket considering we just have four hens

At a recent SENS (Sustainable Environment Network Systems) group meeting in my area, several experts on harvesting, processing and storing food gave mini talks. I was quite interested in the mini root cellar. Even those who have a tiny bit of yard can use this method. Simply find a large bin with a good fitting lid (an old camping cooler works great) and then dig a hole and put the bin in the hole. Cover it with leaves and voila, a modern day root cellar, which will store potatoes, carrots, beets, onions, squash, etc. If you are like me though, you may need to dig a few holes and have several boxes because our squash crop alone would fill up a box. (and I recently gave a bunch away to family who don't have gardens)

No root cellar....no problem, just dig and hole, find a container that seals well and put some leaves on top

Here's Kate, harvesting a spaghetti squash to take for show and tell. She said many children in her class had never seen one so her teacher roasted it in the kitchen and they all got to taste it. In our day and age, many children don't know how food is grown or even what it tastes like fresh YUM!

We planted fruit trees in our backyard eight years ago this fall and this was the first year we had what I call a BUMPER crop of apples on our two trees; a honey crisp and a spartan. If I had thinned them a bit more, I would have grown even more usable apples...ah a note to self for next year.

Still, it was enough to keep me busy most nights making apple sauce, apple crisp, apple pies, and recently, I tried drying the apples. Soaking them in water with a bit of lemon juice helped to keep them from going brown. The kids love them!

Victoria and Kathryn digging up potatoes, we planted them near the lavender this year with lots of bees and we had a great crop of nice size potatoes, of course last fall I dug in a lot of dried leaves and grass clippings into this area and that seems to have lightened the soil so big ones could grow.

Will was so proud of the corn he grew. Although he only had a 4x4 foot box to grow it in, we had at least 5 good feeds from that crop of corn. Next year will even be better since this was the first year we did it in the box and of course there is cardboard at the bottom which will have decomposed next season. We will also rotate it to the far box.

Even Harrison brought food in from the garden this summer...I had to laugh when I took this picture since the purple cabbage he just picked for coleslaw one night is the size of a basketball and he's wearing one of his team basketball shirts in this picture. I'm going to miss watching him play this winter...but to each season in life there is a gift.

                                                        "to every season there is a gift"


I put the dried apples in a large canning jar in our pantry and the kids help themselves when they want a snack. When I see them sitting at our kitchen island, with the pantry door open and the jar of dried apples in their lap, it takes me right back to my childhood, when I felt safe and comforted with our full pantry.

The kids coming in from the garden for some hummus on bagels and a large bowl of veggies...behind Victoria is our pantry cupboard where I keep jars of dried apples, nuts, and baking supplies. Maybe it will be part of their childhood memory one day.

 What are your happiest childhood memories? Do they have anything to do with food?

We have had so many apples this fall that one day, we came home to find a large brown, paper bag at our front door that said, "Chinese" food on the outside. The kids got so excited, after all, who doesn't like take out? But then they all groaned when they saw it was just a big bag of apples. (If they only knew in most parts of the world this would be a real treat but not so much here in apple country) Thanks Auntie J....it was nice to have another variety of apples to try and even if the kids weren't thrilled with more of the fresh stuff, I was and I knew exactly what to do with that bag of apples.

Our eight year old Honey Crisp apple tree

Next year I have to thin them so I get more usable apples, still they are great for apple sauce and drying

Soaking the cut and peeled apples for 5 minutes in water and a bit of lemon juice keeps them from going brown

Dried apples are my new kid's favourite snack, sweet and chewy!

So while harvesting is in full swing around here. We are also mindful of the memories we are creating for ourselves and our children. One thing we have started back up again is Friday family fun night. (Sorry Harry but you used to win all the time anyway!) It's one night of the week where we actually don't have anything going on. I thought it would be the perfect night to get the kids involved making a meal together. After dinner we can play a few board games or card games. Maybe work on a puzzle together. It's been a big hit so far and the kids start talking about what we will make for dinner and what game we will play early in the week so I know it's something they look forward to.

Grace helping to make pizza on family fun night

Grace taught me how to make stuffed crust pizza..it's easy, just mozzarella cheese, oregano, basil and garlic!

 If you are one of those families still ordering pizza...get on board; homemade pizza RULES! Check out a post where I share our easy pizza recipe and pile your favourites on top.

Our new fall schedule, busy with everything that interests us and something for everyone

And while making memories with our children are a highlight for David and I, as we know how fast little ones grow, we also know that partners can lose each other while raising a family. This fall, we have made a point of having a dedicated, Saturday Date night.

So far we have only managed a few evenings staying home with popcorn, licorice and Netflix, except for one night we went to our new Starbuck's coffee shop in town and chatted, while sipping on a pumpkin spice latte! It was absolutely yummy. Also, did you know that if you bring your OWN CUP, they will fill it to the top with your beverage of choice and it's actually, 10 cents cheaper than if you use one of their paper cups. I love it!

(If you want to make your own pumpkin spice lattes this fall, check out my blog post; Simple Pleasures)

This weekend is Thanksgiving in my part of the world. I have so much to be thankful for this year.

Let me list a few of them off, although they aren't in any particular order....I'm thankful for.....

1. Peace: I live in Canada....living in a country that is peaceful is not something I take for granted.

2. Health: Being healthy and having a healthy family but knowing our health care is excellent if we need it is huge

3. Education: From our youngest who are in elementary school to our oldest who are in University or beyond, we feel fortunate to have access to wonderful education in our country

4. Clean water and food: Abundance of both....we are so blessed.

5. A Home: Seeing others less fortunate reminds me of simply having somewhere safe to put my head is everything.....let's help others less fortunate!

6. Warm Clothes and Shoes....at this time of year when the days are colder, I'm so grateful and I'm happy to declutter and share what we aren't using with others. Makes me smile when I can share

7. Hope: Having hope and moving in the direction of creating a world where EVERYONE can have the things I have listed above, keeps me saying, "thank you!"

My husband David will be out of town on work for much of the weekend (thankful for his job) but he will return in time for us to celebrate his birthday on Monday. And so I will end this blog, saying,                                                       "Happy Birthday David!"

David in September...little picnic in the park

And this following song, "Harvest Moon," by Neil Young, is dedicated to you. On our next date night, let's dance under the light of the moon. "I'm still in love with you on this harvest moon."

Thank you for coming to visit today. I hope you are harvesting food and memories in your home too.

But MOST of all, let HOPE be harvested from your heart. Let's gather together and be grateful for what we have and share our bounty with others. I'm holding my vision of a brighter world for all.

 
Until we connect again, may you be well, happy and peaceful.

Blessings from Hope

Loving the World

                                      ~The most powerful weapon in the Universe is Love~

Every day there is something horrendous happening on our planet. If it's not from natural disasters, like the forest fires in my area, it's hurricanes in the Caribbean, or earthquakes in Mexico, and if it's not that, it's man made atrocities, which are even more tragic, since those can be prevented.

And while the only thing we can do to avoid some of the natural disasters, are to move in the direction of green environmental practices, which hopefully will restore our earth's balance, unfortunately, there is little we can do to assist in situations like what the Muslim's of the Rakhine state, are experiencing in Myanmar right now. These are crimes against humanity and it makes my heart ache and eyes fill with tears.

I am not rich, nor do I have any fame, but I know that as a soul, on an earthly experience, I am limitless and so lately I've been praying for an answer as to how I can help the world. I am a mom, and I like to think that I'm a writer too and while this tiny blog isn't much, right now it's the only voice I have.

                                      I feel compelled to write, but what do I say?

And then, after I said goodbye to the kids this morning I decided to take some time for me and sit. Just sit and breathe. It's been so hard to meditate lately. It seems like there is always something more pressing to do; laundry, making meals, cleaning bathrooms, harvesting food and processing food from our garden, but today, something was drawing me to my mat.

Our kids, Victoria, William, and Kathryn waiting for the bus....I miss them but they love school!

I sat for a bit but could not focus on my breath so I found my lap top, plugged it in near my burgundy meditation cushions and googled, "meditating with Deepak." And that is when I was given the answer to my prayer; Dr.Deepak Chopra reached out and used HIS gifts for connection and touched me.

"Thank you Deepak!"

As Deepak says in the following meditation, we CAN make a difference in the world because we are all inexplicably woven together and connected, (I guess that is why I've been crying so much lately) and any love we give to others, or ourselves, ripples out into the world.

Hitting myself on the forehead!!!

With that insight, or rather that reminder, 'cause I KNOW THIS STUFF, but like reminding our kids to be kind and share, (something they know intrinsically and usually do everyday) I had to be reminded that we DO touch each other and we CAN help each other as a result.

I CAN make a difference in the world today.


How, you may ask?

Well, it's so simple it makes me cry again for the ease of it.

It doesn't take any money, hardly any effort, and only a glimpse of time. It does take awareness though and an intention.

An intention to...................... Love the World.

It's as simple as this; to love the world, you simple love yourself.

Yes, that's right.

You just need to love yourself and how hard can that be?

You'd think it would be easy because most of us think about US, first? It's a survival thing isn't it?


Well, obviously it's very hard for many of us because if we were more loving to ourselves, and felt like we were worthy of that love, there wouldn't be the wars, the crimes against humanity, the throwing of hateful tweets, out via our social media; there would just be harmony.

If you stop and think about our world leaders, who are the ones bringing peace and who are the ones who are creating havoc?  I've been shaking my head all year watching Donald Trump and trying to figure out his intention when he says something hurtful or tweets something inappropriate. And also the leader of North Korea, Kim Jong-un. What is going on in these men's brains? I'm trying to think logically but maybe that is the problem....

and as a mom, I just want to pull their heads together and whisper, "be kind, be loving."

Do you think they were truly loved and accepted as babies, as children, as young people growing up, or did they have something to prove to their mentors, their parents, and their support system? I may be wrong,  and I'm certainly no psychologist but often when my children strike out at others, it's because they aren't feeling good about themselves. Often, when I just draw them close for a hug and a soft talk, I can feel their shoulders ease and they smile out into the world again.

My gut says it's that simple and yet, why do we human beings continue to not choose that path?

Why is there so much suffering? Is this just the human condition?

I know that I have felt not worthy of love many times in my life. Often that is why I'm running around trying to make my life appear perfect so others will think I'm more lovable and I'm also trying to impress them with my ability to juggle all the balls.. Ha! I'm a terrible juggler, but I'm pretty good at watching them drop and finally getting some insights.

I'm conscious of it but instead of sitting on my mat this week, I flew around doing everything but.....hey, I know I'm preaching to the choir here, why else would you be reading this blog, but really, this is one of the reasons I haven't been blogging much this year. I'm trying to figure all this stuff out....and then I remember, oh right. You don't have to figure it all out. Hope.....you just need to love yourself, experience the journey, and love those around you.

 It's that easy!

If you can relate at all, to some of my rambling thoughts and my solution to helping our earth, then please join me this week doing two things:

1. Join me in being free of judgement. (let's call ourselves minimalist in this regard)  For today, let no judgements form in your head...or touch your heart. (If you are like me this will be hard to do but the peace that comes is HUGE!) When a judgement comes, observe it and let it go...because you know we aren't just judging others...oh no, we are judging ourselves. Ouch!

AND number 2.....

2. Take 15 minutes and sit on your mat. (If you don't have one, find a comfy cushion and a special place that you can call your own) Let Deepak come into your home and open up our heart chakra. Connect with your sacred breathe and repeat the heart mantra, "YUM."

When we fill ourselves with love, the energy moves out into the world

When I heard the mantra Deepak suggested, to open our heart chakra, I had to laugh because that is a word I say around here a lot! Especially this time of year; when I'm out in my garden and biting into a crisp, delicious apple straight off the tree, or finding a ripe cherry tomato waiting just for me. Yum is my most used words with all the harvesting going on so maybe that is why my heart chakra has been so open and I've been more sensitive to all the events in the world. BUT now, I am going to send it within and I KNOW, it will ripple out into the world.

Yum! yum! yum!

The last thing we can do is pray. I know it sounds so insignificant but I believe in the power of prayer. It works daily in my life...after all I wouldn't have been reminded of this simple lesson today.

And now my dear blogging family, let's meditate. Find a comfy pillow, or sit in a chair with your feet touching the ground, palms up on your knees and click play on your computer. Here's the link to Deepak's meditation, "Loving the World."

Ahhhh....that's better. And with a smile and a wave for my little people will be home soon, I say goodbye. Thanks for connecting with me today! I can feel that connection moving out into the world and touching the whole planet.

Until we meet again, may you be well, happy and peaceful.

Namaste,
Hope

P.S. And in case you wonder about my judgements in this post, I'm letting them go...they are an observation and no more. We are all in the process and our on our own journey!...even if we are together in the big scheme of things....hugs to you all!

Cheese Enchiladas and Reflections from Summer

"Whoever hath a seed time of grace pass over his soul, shall have his harvest also of joy."
                                                                                                                             ~William Gurnall~

I won’t lie, the first day of fall was not a joyful one for me. It’s not that I don’t love the autumn season, for I do. Ah, the cooler days with the fresh smell of apples ripening in the air, the crunch of leaves under my feet and the scarlet reds, brilliant yellow and oranges, are normally a welcoming delight for me.

 It’s just that this year, I didn’t feel like I’d had enough summer.

Forest fires burned relentlessly, throughout our province, without any sign of abatement due to the hot and dry weather we experienced. For most of July and August I would wake early to the acrid smell of smoke, drifting through my slightly opened bedroom doors. I knew before even rising, from the dim light filtering through the curtains, that instead of crystal blue skies, I would find a grey and white blanket heavy above me, choking me from the beauty of summer, making me feel like I was swimming under water, unable to catch my breath.

Grace sitting on a picnic table during our camping trip...you can see the haze of smoke hovering over the lake

And what made it even worse was being imprisoned with our young children, in fear of damaging their lungs due to the poor air –quality, we spent our days pent up inside our often blistering house. The air conditioner, which we had installed after the staggering hot summer of 1998, the summer I had been pregnant with our now 18 year old son, decided to work intermittently this summer.

Usually on the hottest of days it would decide to freeze up and we would be left sweltering, like hostages in the worst of prisons. Purchasing a new one was out of the question, since we were about to send that same 18 year old off to University and like some rich parents (we're not!) of entitled kids, (he's not) we had agreed to pay for his school expenses.

One night in summer I woke to the smell of burning wood and when I glanced outside, the moon was full and almost orange from all the smoke in the air

So on those days when the fine particles in the smoke were most toxic,  the kids and I spent hours inside playing every board game in the house, reading countless books until our eyes were red and sore and figuring out which puzzles had the most missing pieces. Occasionally, feeling trapped and isolated, I would turn on the television and catch a bit of National news, and that’s when a heavier oppression hit me; our interior region was making National headlines.

News stories, showing forest fires ablaze and people fleeing their homes for safer ground, not knowing  if they would have a home to return to drifted into our family room, like the smoke in the air around us. Compounding my depression over the conditions we were living under, a thick layer of guilt grimly covered me.

We were having a good summer compared to them.

Then if I clicked the remote just five channels over to capture images rolling from CNN, real fear encompassed me. Concerns that, “Rocket Man,” whom the United States President, Donald Trump, called the dictator, Kim Jong-un, of North Korea, would catapult one of his intercontinental ballistic missiles, this one armed with nuclear weapons, and our world would erupt into war, ending life as we know it.

 Well, let’s just say life period.

So yeah, summer wasn’t great and I’m not greeting fall with higher expectations, since fall leads to 

winter, when our valley is immersed in inversion type weather systems, where we are permanently

 trapped under dark cloud and experience bitterly cold days.

I'm not ready for that yet! I didn't get enough sun yet to keep me going through our darkest months.

 Wait though, our eight year old son William, and his six year old twin sisters, Kathryn and Victoria,

 have all come running into the house now and are excitedly calling my name. “Mommy, Mommy,

 you won’t guess what we found in the raspberry patch?” Pardon me as I put down the lid of my

 laptop and see what they want.

 Sliding my reading glasses down my nose, I peer at their animated faces and see that my curly,

 blonde headed Will is holding something cupped in his hands. The little girls, are glued next to him,

 as if they are all one unit, holding this single item up for perusal. “Remember how you thought there

 was a squash growing under the raspberries?” Will said, and I answered “yeah?” “Well,” they all

 chimed in together, “it wasn’t a squash.” And then they extended a perfectly round, luminous, orb,

 circled with tiny rivers of green towards me. 

Suddenly, looking at our children’s shining, exuberant faces, and then down at the round and glowing

cantaloupe they were holding, I was reminded of the goodness of earth and the abundant lessons
always springing forth; from the ground and from the innocent joy of our children.

Behind the children and to the right, you can see the cantaloupe plant..which I thought was a squash, growing out under the newly planted raspberries....the seed must have been in the compost mixture I used to top up the raised bed....unexpected gifts from the earth and answers to a prayer to bring hope to dim season

Maybe this fall is going to be better than expected

Please join me in saying goodbye to summer, as we sip the last of the ice tea and make some cheese 

enchiladas. If you want an easy meal, this is it! At this time of year, I'm really busy roasting and
freezing tomatoes, making apple sauce, blanching and freezing the last of the beans so this quick and
easy type dinner, fits the bill perfectly. Also, as you may know from reading my blog, our
son Harrison recently left for University. While I've been sad to see him go, since he was a meat lover
and would often groan when I would make a veggie dish, it's nice to be able to make something
more of us love without the negative vibes. Sorry Harry....but something good comes from every
season in life. (we miss you in every other way!)

Our vegetable loving Victoria next to her garden...the bees love her zinnias!

I hope you too are looking forward to fall and the goodness that comes from each season. 

Now let's make some enchiladas.......

(Years ago, I was an accredited La Leche League leader and this recipe was found in one of their books, "Whole Foods for the Whole Family.")

Cheese Enchiladas

Ingredients

Sauce:

3 tbsp of oil

1 to 2 tbsp of chili powder 

2 tbsp of flour

2 cups water

1 tbsp vinegar

1 tsp garlic powder

1/2 tsp oregano

1/2 tsp sea salt

Bean Filling:

2 cups cooked pinto beans

1/4 cup chopped green onions

1 cup cottage cheese

1/2 cup chopped green bell pepper

1/4 cup chopped almonds

1/2 cup wheat germ

1/2 cup chopped black olives

Tortillas

8 flour (see recipe below to make from scratch)

2 tbsp oil

Toppings

1 cup shredded cheddar cheese

1 cup plain yogurt

2 tbsp chopped onion

Directions:

If you really want to stretch your budget, use dried beans. To make 2 cups of cooked pinto beans you need 3/4 of a cup of dried beans. This little bag for $2.00 has enough dried beans for MANY meals!

Combine sauce ingredients in saucepan; mix well. Bring to a boil; reduce heat. Simmer for 5 minutes

Combine filling ingredients in bowl, mashing beans and mixing well. Fry tortillas briefly in oil in 

skillet. spoon filling onto tortillas; roll to enclose filling. Place seam side down in shallow baking

 dish. Pour sauce over enchiladas; top with 1 cup shredded cheese. Bake at 350 degrees for 20 

minutes, spooning sauce over top occasionally. Serve with topping of yogurt and onion. May

 substitute shredded sharp cheese for cottage cheese, sunflower seeds fro almonds or green olives for 

black olives. Or if you wish omit olives, wheat germ, yogurt, or onion.

This is a quick, nutritious, and EASY meal, not to mention inexpensive for a crowd. Make the sauce

 and filling ahead of time and you can make it easily when your family gathers. Put some rice on, 

add some tortillas chips and you have a delicious meal for those you love.

The last watermelon of summer, and a smattering of summer corn, all adds to this change of season meal...well this is a meal for all season but boy did it taste good sitting outside on the last of summer

 

Will and his corn. While this crop would probably do better directly in the ground, we still harvested many ears of corn from this little 4x4 crop space...plus we now have seeds to try it again next year

 

If you want to take it to another level of being sustainable, make your own flour tortillas. (also from the recipe book above)

Flour Tortillas or Chapathis

Ingredients

4 cups whole wheat flour

1 teaspoon salt

1/4 teaspoon baking powder (opt)

1/4 to 1/2 cup butter or oil

1 cup warm water

Directions:

Combine dry ingredients in bowl. Work in butter or oil...this is optional as well. Add enough water

soft, pliable dough. Knead lightly on floured surface.Divide into 6 balls, let rest, covered for 15- 20 

minutes. Roll into thin circles, between sheets of floured, waxed paper. Bake in ungreased, heavy 

skillet, or griddle, until brown specks appear on cooking side. Cook over and cook on the other side. 

These store well in fridge or freezer. Makes 16 servings.

Sadie and I... aka Sweet Girl at the end of summer

"You carry Mother Earth within you. She is not outside of you. Mother Earth is not just your
environment. In that insight of inter-being, it is possible to have real communication with the
earth, which is the highest form of prayer." ~Thich Nhat Hanh~


Thank you for coming to visit me today.

Until we meet again, may you be well, happy and peaceful.

Blessings from Hope

The End of the Road

                    "I blinked and you were gone, around the corner and out of my vision"

The rain dropped meditatively against the windshield and dim light shone through the cab of the truck  I was driving. The roar of the engine was white noise and the bouncing seat a gentle cradle, as I rumbled along the highway, and although I was acutely aware of all of my senses, I felt as if I were floating on a fluffy grey cloud.  The air was oxygen rich with the dampness, accentuating the rich smell of oil permeating the truck’s cab. I turned the large black steering wheel to meet the curves in the road, allowing it to ground me to earth and my rhythmic heart beat.

Thumping steadily, the windshield wipers relaxed me into a deeper peaceful state and I drifted along, casually noticing how brilliant the green foliage was blurring by my side window, a sharp contrast to the grey of the day. Suddenly large buckets of rain started thundering overhead, and although I turned the wipers on high, they did nothing to clear my vision of the road.  Panicked, I geared down but it was too late, a millisecond later I knew I was about to hit something dark and ominous. A horrendous crash filled my brain and then everything went black.

I awoke totally disoriented, trying to catch my breath and assess my surroundings. “Where was I?”  reverberated through my brain as I sat up and opened my eyes. Early morning light filtered through my bedroom venetians, centering me and I collapsed against my nest of pillows. Oh! it was only a dream.  Picking up my cell phone from my bedside table, I saw it was 6:28 a.m. and the date was September 14, 2017.

I sighed and laid back, pulling the comforter up to my chin thinking gratefully that I still had another half an hour before I had to get up and get the kids ready for school. My husband David was still sleeping quietly, laying on the bitter edge of our queen size bed.  I always tease him about sleeping on the edge, and he says, "yep, that’s my life, living on the edge." Breathing deeply and sighing a second time, I closed my eyes and furrowed my brow, trying to remember the last vestiges of my fleeting dream. Who was I in that dream because it felt like I was there and yet, I was looking through someone else's eyes? What a weird sensation and the more I tried to capture the images, they floated even farther away, like a balloon let loose in the wind, drifting steadily upward. 

 Then I remembered that today was the anniversary of my Dad’s death.

 September 14, 1965.

I’ll never know what happened to him. They say that it had been a hot and dry summer in Hope that year and on the day of his death it had rained cats and dogs. The speculation was that the #1 Highway that went through the Fraser Canyon, where  he had been delivering oil in his Esso company truck, was probably slick, and despite his excellent driving skills, the conditions had been extremely dangerous. The thought was that he was coming too fast towards the American-Creek bridge and when he tried to slow down, his truck hydroplaned into the side of it, flipping the cab of the truck forward and that action, caused a neck injury. We will never know. The first people to the accident were fearful of the truck exploding, so hastily they moved my unconscious Dad out of the collapsed cab, and in doing so, damaged his spinal cord further, cutting off his airways.

 He died on the side of the road.

 "I blinked and you were gone, around the corner and out of my vision"

My dad Marvyn and my mom Ethel...wearing their matching winter shirts

For years I lived in the shadow of grief, feeling orphaned and alone. Sympathy shrouded me as friends and family whispered, “oh poor Debbie, five is too young to lose a Dad.” I’m older now than he was when he died at age forty five and I understand that the end of his road was the beginning of mine. I guess that is why I write this blog. That is why I have been working on putting my story into memoir form.

Life is precious!

We never know when our road will end. With that knowledge, I scribble away. I write here on my blog, I keep journals, I make lists, I write outlines for potential books, and I've been involved  in a writing group for over a year now, composing little vingettes from my life, in hopes that finally, FINALLY, I will put all the pieces of the puzzle together into a semblance of  something worthy of a lifetime.

Having this blog has been fun, as it's my way to pass on favourite recipes and little stories about my family; my thoughts and ideas about our changing world and how becoming sustainable will help to heal our planet. I want to hold up a candle of peace as well, for our children and their children to follow. Our oldest children will remember most of the stories  but our youngest, our last four, may not, so this is a piece of me for them. After all, who am I kidding, I'm more than half way through my life (if I live to be a centurion) and my path will end. As my husband's dad, Ron Reynolds, who was in the cemetery business, used to say with a cynical grin,

 "none of us get out of here alive!"

Some days, my brain is so full of marbles rolling around, that I wonder if anything coherent is being churned out but I continue to write. I write for my Dad too. Yes he drove truck for a living but he was so much more. He was a true Renaissance man. A man of honour and integrity. He was hardworking and would do anything for his family. I can remember going to bed at night to the sweet, woodsy aroma of his pipe tobacco in the air and hearing him tapping away on his black, Underwood typewriter, in the small alcove above my room. After his death, we found love poems he had written for my mom, for his children and other deeply moving pieces. Other nights, I would fall asleep to the gentle, hypnotic melodies lilting into my room, while he played his violin or the accordion, both of which were self taught.

Literature and music weren't his only passions. In the last years, he enjoyed shooting family movies on his Kodak 8 mm camera and piecing those memories together. My favourite times, were family movie night, when we would sit in our darkened living room and laugh over his latest film. He was a man's man. He loved sports and was a dedicated hockey coach. In the last year of his life we found countless letters he had written to encourage our little town to build an ice rink and after his death we heard that those words were instrumental in making it a reality. He had also coached soccer with his brother Al. Their team had won a very prestigious title in the Fraser valley, highly coveted in those days. Then there were my floating memories of being a young child and hearing my Dad yelling louder than anyone at my older sister's basketball games. He was so proud of his athletic girls. He was a ladies man too and I know with his good looks and ease on the dance floor, that he left many women envying my mom, who was the love of his life. 

My young parents...before us

For years I felt fearful that I'd never get my story written, so much of it has been wrapped up with the end of my Dad's life, but in the last ten years his whispers have grown stronger. He has been encouraging me from the other side of the curtain to follow my bliss and get my writing going. Just as he was yelling support to my sisters at their sporting activities, he is now telling me to pick the pieces up and write.

This will be the gift  I leave for my children; for my Dad's grandchildren and beyond,

                           because you know,  the road goes ever on.

This blog post is in memory of my Dad, "Marvyn Derwent CLark (April 1920- Sept 14, 1965)

Click on the hyper-link "Don Messer's final song, "Til we meet again," if you can't see it above.

Until we meet again, may you be well, happy and peaceful.

Blessings from Hope